Fellow moms, it's all happened to us. An older mom/grandma sees you with your adorable young children and says with a sigh, "oh, treasure every moment my dear".
And you look at her like, Is she NUTS?! Treasure the spit up on my blouse, the dark bags under my eyes, the fights with my husband because neither one of us is rational with no sleep, the filth of my house and the tantrums, treasure the tantrums!?
Sigh. Treasure those moments, my dears. Treasure them. Because one day your tantruming snot nosed toddler will be a snotty mouthed, door slamming TWEEN.
Moms: my son is a teenager. Like, for reals. The signs have been there for months, but lately they are unmistakable
Sign 1: He's really, really interested in how he looks. No more wearing whatever mom got on sale at Target or the local thrift store. Nope, no, no way. His look is highly personalized, involves carefully considered (and expensive!) clothing and accessories and his favorite shirt which must be worn nearly every day, so get going on that laundry woman. (Also we now shop in the men's department because he towers over most grown people at age 11 because life is not even a little bit fair.)
Sign 2: Grooming. Oh, the grooming. This child, with whom a year ago I battled with to take a weekly shower, now has his own personal soaps, creams and potions, and will spend upwards of an hour in a steamy bathroom primping himself. And then leave the bathroom a sodden, disgusting mess.
Sign 3: His phone addiction. The phone (which you got him for SAFETY, right, ha ha.) is now an extension of him. He'll forget his homework, his name, any number of chores, his keys, but he will always know where that phone is. Prying out of his clutches is now a daily chore which both of us loathe.
There are other signs of course. You were all teens, use your imagination. All I can say is, I hug my 7 year old baby girl a lot tighter these days. I'm drinking in her sweet, sassy little self that I can still pick up. I'm relishing her 100 times daily "hey mom, guess what!?" I'm saying yes anytime she "needs a snuggle".
Because in 4 years, that child will give me nothing but back talk and slammed doors. Lord, have mercy. I'm not handing this well, not at all. I know I should "have some chill" as my teen says. I know I should great his grumps with humor and his curses with calm. I'm sorry, I'm new at this parenting teens thing I my chill is red hot. It's hard. It's really hard to see your once adorable boy turn into a surly mess. I know he's riding the hormone roller coaster and his frontal lobe is not operational yet, but sometimes I was to yell, "what are you doing, are you stupid!?".
Teens make a lot of really, really dumb decisions. They are like toddlers but with Internet access and biceps. And they spend most of their time with other dumb teens which can't help.
So here I am, digging down into the trenches of teen parenting. Reading his text messages and trying not to correct his spelling. Cringing at the social awkwardness and the walking into messes and grimacing through the yo-mama jokes and the loudness. Limiting his screen time and trying to loosen the reigns. Two steps into freedom and three steps back into limits again.
Nobody is really enjoying this and we are all just hoping to get through to the other side intact. Occasionally there are beautiful glimpses of the responsible, warm hearted, funny young man he will be in just a few years. Then he starts burping the alphabet.
And you look at her like, Is she NUTS?! Treasure the spit up on my blouse, the dark bags under my eyes, the fights with my husband because neither one of us is rational with no sleep, the filth of my house and the tantrums, treasure the tantrums!?
Sigh. Treasure those moments, my dears. Treasure them. Because one day your tantruming snot nosed toddler will be a snotty mouthed, door slamming TWEEN.
Moms: my son is a teenager. Like, for reals. The signs have been there for months, but lately they are unmistakable
Sign 1: He's really, really interested in how he looks. No more wearing whatever mom got on sale at Target or the local thrift store. Nope, no, no way. His look is highly personalized, involves carefully considered (and expensive!) clothing and accessories and his favorite shirt which must be worn nearly every day, so get going on that laundry woman. (Also we now shop in the men's department because he towers over most grown people at age 11 because life is not even a little bit fair.)
Sign 2: Grooming. Oh, the grooming. This child, with whom a year ago I battled with to take a weekly shower, now has his own personal soaps, creams and potions, and will spend upwards of an hour in a steamy bathroom primping himself. And then leave the bathroom a sodden, disgusting mess.
Sign 3: His phone addiction. The phone (which you got him for SAFETY, right, ha ha.) is now an extension of him. He'll forget his homework, his name, any number of chores, his keys, but he will always know where that phone is. Prying out of his clutches is now a daily chore which both of us loathe.
There are other signs of course. You were all teens, use your imagination. All I can say is, I hug my 7 year old baby girl a lot tighter these days. I'm drinking in her sweet, sassy little self that I can still pick up. I'm relishing her 100 times daily "hey mom, guess what!?" I'm saying yes anytime she "needs a snuggle".
Because in 4 years, that child will give me nothing but back talk and slammed doors. Lord, have mercy. I'm not handing this well, not at all. I know I should "have some chill" as my teen says. I know I should great his grumps with humor and his curses with calm. I'm sorry, I'm new at this parenting teens thing I my chill is red hot. It's hard. It's really hard to see your once adorable boy turn into a surly mess. I know he's riding the hormone roller coaster and his frontal lobe is not operational yet, but sometimes I was to yell, "what are you doing, are you stupid!?".
Teens make a lot of really, really dumb decisions. They are like toddlers but with Internet access and biceps. And they spend most of their time with other dumb teens which can't help.
So here I am, digging down into the trenches of teen parenting. Reading his text messages and trying not to correct his spelling. Cringing at the social awkwardness and the walking into messes and grimacing through the yo-mama jokes and the loudness. Limiting his screen time and trying to loosen the reigns. Two steps into freedom and three steps back into limits again.
Nobody is really enjoying this and we are all just hoping to get through to the other side intact. Occasionally there are beautiful glimpses of the responsible, warm hearted, funny young man he will be in just a few years. Then he starts burping the alphabet.
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